4EverythingNanny, Nanny Services for Parents To Find A Nanny, Nannies, Nanny Agency Search, Nanny Jobs

Finding a Nanny

Should I hire a live-in or a live-out Nanny ?

Should I try one of these online registries?

How long should our "trial" period be?

The following questions were submitted to Parents and Nannies in survey form. Each individual's response is preceded by a ~ symbol). As you will see, in many cases there is no "one" answer.

Where do I start ?

~ Talk with friends, neighbors, parents at playgroup or daycare. Find someone who has or had a nanny. Read all the books, web sites, materials you can. Find and talk with several agencies.

~ Tell everyone you know and run into that you are looking for someone. Tell your hairdresser, your doctor, children's teachers etc.. Post a note in your church newsletter. Post info on any internet lists that you are comfortable with the folks. Ask your friends and family to do all of the same. The agency route can be helpful but we have hired agencies twice and got very little for the sum of money that we paid them. I'm sure that there are good agencies out there that we haven't come across. If you advertise your position -- have people respond to a P.O. Box number or call a telephone line that you don't routinely use and have them leave a message -- gives you the ability to screen calls. And pray, pray, pray that the right person will come your way

~ I researched nanny vs. au pair for many months. An anal amount of research. I talked with nannies, previous au pairs, families with nannies, families with au pairs, agencies, etc. Read books. Websites. Joined ParentsWithNannies. Then the interviews started. I actually only interviewed four nannies and worked with three agencies.

~ My original search 3 years ago started by looking in a local paper for nanny agencies. The last 2 agencies I used came from online surfing.

~ I started by doing a lot of research on the internet as well as contacting local nanny agencies. I obtained these agencies' reference lists to find out if other parents were happy with them. I also went to a local college which has a good early child development program and put an ad in the college placement office.

~ Start by doing some research. Read some books about finding/hiring a nanny and do an online search. There are websites, bulletin boards and mailing lists that are solely dedicated to the Nanny Topic.

Back to Top

How early should I start looking?

~The instant you decided you want one OR the instant you feel comfortable that you have done all the research you need to determine this is the right decision for you and your child. Give yourself plenty of time. Don't rush the process. Don't take the first nanny that seems good simply because you are anxious. I've also contacted our church and there will be a request in the bulletin on Sunday. I've also talked to the two colleges in our area and I will be putting up a job description there.

~The minute you know you are going to need a Nanny. As a rule, we have found that the best Nannies are in jobs already so you have to be at the right place at the right time to find out about their availability.

~ I like to allow 2-3 months, but have done it in 2 weeks (I did regret that decision).

~ I would start at least 6-8 weeks in advance.

~ It depends on how comfortable you feel about what you're doing. It took me about 2 months of research before I felt comfortable enough to actually look for a nanny. I'd say to start about 2-3 months before you might actually need a nanny because it might take some time to find just the right person.

Back to Top

Should I hire a live-in or a live-out Nanny?

~ Conduct a good needs assessment before making this decision. Why do you WANT a nanny? What will a nanny provide you with? If you work long hours and need a flexible schedule, you might require live in. If you work a regular schedule (same days, same hours) you could consider live out. Be warned that hiring live out makes you dependent on someone else's schedule. If your nanny gets stuck in traffic, or is late, so are you. This is usually not the case with live in.

~ Depends on your situation. We had our first Nanny when we had a relatively small three bedroom house. A Live In would never have worked for us as no one would have had any privacy. We now have a much larger home with a separate Mother-In-Laws kind of suite in our basement. It has a separate entrance so our Nanny can come and go without disturbing us or our kids. To me, the biggest difference in a Live In versus a Live Out Nanny is how well you think the Nanny will fit in as a part of your family. When we had a Live Out Nanny, we were concerned about her ability to love and care for our children. With a Live In Nanny, we are concerned about the same things but we also wanted to really like her as a person since she would be a big part of our family life -- seven days a week -- 12-16 hours a day.

~ Live-in or live out will depend on your finances and what your actual childcare needs are. Both of these will need to be evaluated carefully. Live-out nannies can get up to 3 times the salary of a live-in.

~ For a live-in, you will at least need a private bedroom and bath for the nanny. The biggest issue with a live-in nanny is privacy for both the family and the nanny. The nanny will be in your home 24 hours a day. The positive side to this situation is she will never have trouble getting to your home due to weather etc. since she lives with you. Also, with the live-in situation, the nanny will most likely be able to travel on vacations with you. The positive side to a live-out situation is privacy. With a live-out nanny, I have not been able to find one who wants to travel on vacations because of her other commitments outside of work.

~ There are more rules when you have a live-in nanny because it's important for her to maintain independence. Having a live-in nanny doesn't mean you'll have 24 hrs/7days a week of childcare. She'll need the freedom to come and go during her off hours. You'll not only have your nanny living in the house, but you'll be having a tenant who will be making your home her home. You might have to provide a car. She'll have to have complete access to the house, i.e. house alarm, kitchen, laundry, etc. I personally felt a live-out was the best situation for us, mostly because we simply do not have the room for another adult to live in our home.

A Nanny's view on the Live-in Lifestyle:
I'm a live-in nanny, and it just never feels like my home. One thing I have LOVED, it was such a gift to me, is when they went away for a long weekend and I stayed home. I played my favorite music on the very excellent but largely unused living room stereo (almost impossible to do if there is anyone else home) LOUD, I cooked good old Missouri homestyle food (including odorous pork ribs and kraut) and had breakfast in my pajamas every single day! Alas, I was too busy to have lunch in my pajamas, I had to go out each morning. But it was heaven to make these choices! I left the doors and baby gates open, I had a candlelight bath every night (imagine having to announce you will be lighting a candle so the parents don't have to worry about smelling smoke... candlelight baths are very nice, but not at the expense of giving them a mental image that isn't any of their business.) Families AND Nannies have to compromise in a live-in situation where Nanny does not have her own separate quarters that include kitchen and bath. I'm sure they equally appreciate freedom of choice to relax whenever I am gone for the weekend. It's just, I'm not as much in a position financially to do the weekend getaway, but I AM the one who does it more often. Nevertheless, it is a part of the live-in nanny lifestyle that I have accepted. Someday, though.... a home of my own!

Back to Top

Should I try one of these on-line registries?

~ Sure. Why not. Saturate every possible avenue. You would rather have MORE nannies to pick from than not enough.

~ We tried it -- didn't work

~ I have not tried this yet, but am thinking that if I do my next nanny search myself, I would look carefully at this option. I would also then carefully screen and background check appropriate candidates.

~ Sure! That's exactly where I found my nanny!

Back to Top

Ok, I think I like her, now what ?

~ Background check. Have her spend time (at least an entire day) with your child. Talk with references.

~ Spend as much time with her as you can before you make up your mind. Watch and see how she interacts with your kids and get their thoughts about her (even a 2 yr. old has opinions about a Nanny!). Check personal and professional references. Get a thorough background check completed. Set up all of your paperwork for taxes. Make her a resource book so that she isn't caring for your children blindly. Make sure she has Authorizations to obtain emergency medical care for your children in your absence.

~ Put together an "employment package". How much will you pay, how many hours, vacations, holidays, sick days, benefits, etc.

~ Assuming that all references have been checked and the interview went well, and both parties (nanny and family) are interested, put together a detailed employment agreement that specifies your expectations in terms of the nanny responsibilities, etc... This has been one area where we have made mistakes in the past. We have not had a written agreement upfront. When issues arise, we have had nothing concrete to refer to.

~ I recommend doing a background check on her before inviting her into your home. If you find a nanny through an agency they should help you with this. If you find a nanny on your own, i.e. newspaper, online or word of mouth, you'll need to do the background check on your own. I found a nanny agency that would perform the background for a minimal charge. But there are ways you can do it on your own. You should find plenty of information on this topic during your research. In addition, I recommend you give the potential nanny a few references of your own, i.e. your supervisor at work, a couple of neighbors or family members. This will give her a chance to learn more about you as well.

Back to Top

How long should our trial period be?

~ 90 days.

~ I'm not one for trial periods -- too hard on kids to say "This is your new nanny for the next couple weeks -- if she doesn't like us or we don't like her, she is gone...". My advice is to take a lot of time finding the right person, put together a sound work agreement that you both agree on and schedule regular time to get together to touch base with each other to check on how things are going. Work together to fix potential problems on both sides before they become too big to fix. The important thing here is your children ---- nothing is worse on a toddler or preschooler that constant turnover in their care giver.

~ I think trial periods of 1 month are OK. Any longer might confuse the children. I do think agencies should offer more than a 1 month guarantee, though. Usually the first 1-3 months are a "honeymoon" period where the nanny is on her "best behavior". I have found that by 5-6 months they show their true colors.

~ I would say a four week trial period. You usually know pretty quickly if things are going to work out.

~ I actually didn't have a "trial period" when I hired my nanny. I hired her from another state and flew her in for a weekend before officially offering her the job. It was a good chance for us to get to know each other and for her to see what our family was really like on a daily basis.

Back to Top